


'Twas The Night Before Christmas

by christinefromsherwood



Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Christmas, Humor, M/M, Poetry, in case that wasn't obvious by the title, inspired by the No Time To Die trailer, oh it's in rhyme, so just imagine that it's Christmas Eve when Bond barges his way in through that door, well the 3 seconds of 00q interaction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-06
Updated: 2019-12-06
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:06:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21695101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/christinefromsherwood/pseuds/christinefromsherwood
Summary: His eyes – how they twinkled! His ears were so big!He had a smirk on his face; Lord, what a prick!“Oh, I have missed you, Q!” said the ex-Double-OhHe pushed his way in; Q hated him so.
Relationships: James Bond/Q
Comments: 10
Kudos: 43





	'Twas The Night Before Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> many thanks to Souffle for helping me out with a couple of sucky lines :)

**’** Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the flat  
Not a creature was stirring, not even a cat.   
The helmet was hung on the staircase in shade,   
In hopes that a bike trip soon could be made. 

The cats were all slumbering on their pretty cat tree,   
While gray mice before them in their dreams did flee.   
And Q in his blankets (though he slept in the nude),   
Had just started nibbling on some finger food. 

Then out on the street Q heard the shot of a gun,   
He sprang from the bed and to the window did run.   
Up to the curtain he then pressed his cheek,   
Walther in hand, Q dared take a peek. 

The lamp on the asphalt of the Bermondsey street   
Showed a figure below; Q’s heart gave a leap.   
_There_ stood the man, his ears sticking out,  
Q knew who it was, without one single doubt.

With heart in his throat and his face in a frown,   
Q stepped away from the curtain. He wouldn’t go down.   
Then a ring on his doorbell stabbed at Q’s heart.   
But he had decided: he wouldn’t take part!

“Open up, Q! Please, open up! Quick!”  
Eve’s panicked voice made Q feel quite sick.  
He rushed to the doorway, fingers fumbling the code  
At the sight of the face the door camera showed.

Like when Olympic runners with gold medal in sight  
Crash through the finish line; run with all of their might  
So through Q’s front door two figures did burst,   
Both Eve and the agent, whose name Q so cursed. 

And in the very same moment poor Q realised  
That, as he was naked, some pants were advised.  
He flew to his hamper; the first shirt and jumper he grabbed.  
He’d worn them that evening on his date with dull Brad. 

His cats both woke then, and stretched with a meow,  
Q zipped up his pants with sweat on his brow.  
A few seconds later, from the door came a tap  
Q first checked his monitor, fearing a trap. 

His eyes – how they twinkled! His ears were so big!   
He had a smirk on his face; Lord, what a prick!  
“Oh, I have missed you, Q!” said the ex-Double-Oh  
He pushed his way in; Q hated him so.

Only then did Q notice the wry smile on Eve’s face.  
“This moron got shot out there during the chase.   
We shook them off but-“ Q didn’t listen.  
Through the gray of Bond’s jacket, blood started to glisten.

“Well, isn’t that marvellous!” Q said in a huff,  
Fetching the first aid kit, _not_ admiring Bond’s scruff.  
He took no notice of the curve of Eve’s lip  
As he bent down to tend to Bond’s wounded hip. 

Bond spoke not a word, but Q felt him shiver   
And tried to think hard of a quip to deliver.  
“So you’re not dead, then!” he muttered at last,  
And, at Eve’s quiet snort, Q knew he blushed fast. 

Hours later, with plans made and Eve fast asleep,  
Q fell on his bed in an exhausted heap.   
He heard: “I am sorry, Q. And I’m done playing games.”  
“We’ll see in the morning. Now go to sleep, James.”

**Author's Note:**

> [The Mince Spy - a Christmas fluffy 00Q ballad](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21771967)


End file.
